5,000 Miles Back To Feel 5,000 Miles Away

Yesterday while Andrew and I took a walk around the city, he asked me, "Has being here been all that you expected?" It was a very difficult question to answer. I first explained that yes I expected to see beautiful places that many people travel to. Yes I expected to meet his friends, meet his family, live with him. But the rest couldn't have been expected. I had no expectations because I couldn't imagine that my life could actually turn into what it has. The one thing that has been unexpected is how I've dealt with being here. I have surprised myself when I don't handle something well; when I fall apart and act out irrationally, simply trying to work out my thoughts. But even stronger, I did not expect to have grown and learned as much as I have. These are times in life where we reveal more than we change.

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Christmastime turned out to be one of those unexpected times. When I booked my round trip flight and decided to stay in the UK through the holidays, I really didn't know the odds of actually still wanting to be here or not. But as Christmas came around, I felt exactly where I was supposed to be. 

On Christmas Eve, Andrew, his mum and myself attended a Eucharist service at the church we are getting married in. This was our first time seeing the inside in person. We sat in the pew a bit awestruck gazing up to the high ceiling, over to the organ, back to the Vicar. Without saying a word, we thought to ourselves, the next time we'll be here is when we're rehearsing for our wedding...

I had set times to Skype with family throughout Christmas day and as each conversation ended, I didn't feel that I was missing anything. It may sound harsh when my family reads this, but I know in their hearts, that proves how happy I am. It wasn't that my gifts were better than they would have given me or that the food was better. It was that I was with Andrew. And not to mention, we spent a week with His Royal Highness, Rodney Hooper.

 

& both quickly gained happy pounds from eating at least two desserts a day.

Andrew's family truly has been so loving and welcoming every time I am with them. We literally spent a week eating, drinking, eating, drinking, enjoying our gifts, watching movies, playing games, and getting cat cuddles. The beauty in it was that I would have done the same things with my own family. To be 5,000 miles away from where I grew up and be surrounded by family that is just as loving is a true blessing.

 Harriet the Horse & Genny the Sheep

Merry Christmas! 

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January 6th: 2 weeks since Christmas = 3 days before I fly back to the states.

I stare at the screen now feeling that in a few days my entire environment won't change. I am on the same couch, I see the same fireplace, I am typing on the same laptop, I have a cuppa ready to drink and Andrew is beside me. I can look at the date, January 6th, over and over and still not truly feel the reality of where I am in time. When will it hit me? Will it hit me when I walk off the plane into Houston humidity..? Will it hit me when I feel Andrew's arms release me to walk through security...? Will it hit me after I've been back for a few days and given time for my emotions to catch up...?

A more present question to answer is, how do you spend your last few days in a place? Of course there's all the tedious, practical bits like packing boxes and cleaning house. But when I ask what are the simple parts of our little life together? I think of...

 homemade lasagna...

Liverpool victories...(because we don't talk about when they lose) 

& dancing!

That is exactly how we've spent this weekend together. Just being us, living our simple, beautiful little life. I will be away from my home for a few months, but in that time I will have time with family, I will be planning my wedding, and will work hard every day to keep all that I am blessed with. 

The only way to get through hard times is to focus on what you have more often than what you're missing.